Saturday, January 14, 2012

Journal Reflection

Sitting by the fire all day Saturday and watching time go by. I noticed the day slip by and then around 5 O'Clock the night began to descend and I got to thinking that all anxiety is due to one thing and one thing only: time.

Now I don't have an anxiety problem but I do notice once in a while I feel a little stressed- marking to do, or meetings to go to, and when I watch the day descend today I got to thinking that time just keeps on sliding by. It never stops.

It's incessant. It just keeps sliding ('sliding' is the best metaphor I can think of right now- or slipping) and slipping and even if I wanted the day to last forever it just keeps slipping away from me.

If I started thinking about how I'm getting old and eventually I am going to lose all my faculties and slip into that great void we call death, then once again I can experience that in the fact that the day slips slides away.

And if I project out there to anyone who has anxiety- ie- worries about the future a lot- then I think the essential worry is that time is out of our control. We can't manipulate time.

We can manipulate a lot of things and we can be control freaks about a lot of things but time will not be controlled; but we can be at peace in  the present, let go and relax into this time we have.

It takes practice. And the same thing that makes life so awesome- TIME- is also the thing that slides away from us as we sit by the fire and observe the night descend...
Outside my house

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